I had the opportunity to visit my hometown this past weekend. It’s the first time I’ve visited since my grandmother passed last year. My hometown was throwing their annual celebrations this year and I booked time off work to go. SO and my nephew came with me. I spent time with my parents, my other grandmother and other members of my family that I don’t have the chance to visit often.
In the past ten years many things have changed. People move, people build, people moved back. Homes that would be lit up every night now are dark and vacant. Some have even been torn down due to the time they were kept empty. Homes from my childhood have been renovated; additions have been made to them so they no longer look like the homes from my memories.
People who I felt would be happy to see me hardly gave me a second glance. People I know would be happy to see me never disappoint.
In the past ten years I have perhaps found out many things about myself that has changed me into a more laid-back, open-minded person than I was when I was a teenager. However, I have also become much more reserved. I’ve always had a struggle with knowing if people want me around or use me for convenience. Now, if someone doesn’t make the first move, I’m scared to make any move at all. Those who I tried to speak to made me feel as though they had better things to do than talk to me. Then I just gave up. I didn’t even speak to people that I was close to in high school and university when we all lived here. I didn’t talk to them because I didn’t know if they wanted me to speak to them or not. I hope those who may have found this behavior strange didn’t take offence to it.
But besides for my own insecurities, and the fly bites, the holiday was nice. My uncle gave my nephew and I a ride in boat, had ice cream virtually every day, I even got to take the time to go to my favorite beach on the island.
It made me think of my childhood and teenage years living there. How many times I made the trek to this beach with my friends and the times I made the trek alone. How some of my favorite memories were spent on this very beach. When the changes happen to the rest of the town, this beach remains. The view is the same despite some shifts of rock.
Well SO and I came back yesterday. My nephew stayed out with his grand-parents for another few days. SO is back to work today. I have spent the day watching Netflix and spending time with my super handsome kitty who until yesterday I hadn’t seen for FOUR WHOLE DAYS!
It’s too warm for us to cuddle so he’s taking refuge either in front of the window or on the cold parts of the floor. I have had a fan coming straight at me all day.
Well it’s back to work tomorrow. This holiday will officially come to a close.
All I know is that I love my parents and my family dearly and these trips home does mean a lot to me. Perhaps our views on life are radically different and we butt heads and I bite my tongue quite a bit. But that’s family. And I am certainly blessed to have them.
So that’s enough from me this evening. Pop over to poet’s corner for a new poem that will be posted and check it out!
Cheers and Stay Smiling!