I generally don’t start my entry with a photo. However, this one is quite fitting. Wayne Gretzky’s quote has been bouncing around in my head today.
Now, despite my Canadian heritage, I am not a huge lover of hockey. I may tease my partner about being a Leafs fan and boast about that one time ten years ago I got to see the Sens Battle the Habs in Ottawa (my first and last trip outside Newfoundland) and win (which is why I have a special place in my heart for the Sens, not because of the Hamburgler or whatever other nonsense is taking place). So how did I come across this quote.
For those of you who don’t know me well, I am a HUGE Kevin Smith fan!
I actually read one of Kevin Smith’s books a while back,
Kevin Smith is a HUGE Gretzky fan, bigger than I am a Kevin Smith fan. He actually has a segment of this book discussing his love for Gretzky and that’s where I first heard this quote. Smith goes into details about his life and how he came to be this director. His work is definitely different than other things out there. You either love his work, or you hate his work.
As you can tell in the title of this book, Smith had lots of obstacles in his path to get to be a “respected” director (again, see his filmography) in the film business. He went from making Clerks on a really low budget to multi-million dollar budgets for later films. He went from going to do the blockbuster film back to doing what he wanted despite the want from others to do what they wanted. He overcame the obstacles of pleasing others and started to focus on himself.
Since Tough Sh*t came out, Smith has went back to his roots a bit to make indie films that are both amazing (my opinion) and fucked up. He also decided to be healthier and has lost weight and, according to his Facebook page, is quite happy with the decision to work on being healthier.
Why you may ask am I going on about the love of my life, Kevin Smith, when I have said time and time again stressed that this blog is about me? Well, because I love him, and fuck you!
I don’t inspire to make films about the premise of ass-to-mouth, snowballing, or whether or not Jesus is black. However, Smith took those shots to reach where he is today. If he did not and gave in to those thoughts that he was fat, lazy, and wouldn’t amount to anything, where would he be? Not the love of my life that’s for sure.
Between that and fearing that kick in the ass that Red Forman is more than happy to provide, how can I not be motivated to reach for what I want?
This was the conversation I had with my counsellor today. How to rejuvenate myself and push myself. We decided that I think of Red kicking my ass if I don’t complete what I set out to do. Haha.
In all seriousness, it is very hard to feel motivated when it seems that there is nothing around worth working towards. However, sit down and actually think about that sentence for a moment. Why is this not worth working towards? What has come up that has made you feel as though this isn’t worth reaching for.
For me, I am use to not getting what I want. I never had all the toys or gadgets that my friends had growing up. I don’t have what my adult friends have, for example, careers, homes, families, the opportunity to travel. I know that what we see on Facebook and Instagram is only what others want us to see. We don’t see their credit cards statements showing that they’re maxed out. We don’t hear the arguing that husbands and wives have. No one knows what it’s like behind closed doors.
So I never got what I wanted. I’ll never get what I want… right?
Well with that attitude, that is exactly right. My counsellor called it the “self-fulfilled prophecy,” which means that if you have been telling yourself one thing all of your life, good chance it will be what you will become. I kept telling myself I want to have a career, travel, have a house, and family (in that order… haha) but I never get what I want. So I will probably end up
in some low paying job and never getting to travel not amounting to what I want.
It is a vicious circle. But one that, with STRONG motivation and STRONG self-talk, I believe that can be broken.
Happy Monday folks, this is where I try my best to fight this through. I have to fight for what I want. I encourage YOU to fight for what you want too. You can only be happy if you are happy with yourself. Right now, I’m not happy with myself, so I doing what I can to change it.
Just like Wayne Gretzky, if you don’t take the shot, you’re not getting the goal!
Cheers and Stay Smiling!
P.S. DumbOptimist officially has reached 100 likes on my blog! Thank you so much for the likes. I am ecstatic that this blog has been reaching so many people and they actually enjoy what I have to say! It is a great milestone and I am happy to have gotten there! XOXO!